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Recovery.

#MoreLife, except it’s been feeling like less…

Happy Sunday! ♡ I wanted to provide an update on what’s been going on in my life recently, and how it’s affecting my blog– sorry I’ve been MIA this week! I am freshly recovering from recent knee surgery I had only a couple of weeks ago; in fact the second knee surgery I’ve had in the last 6 months.

To give you a brief history, I have had a series of unfortunate events occur with my legs over the years. I broke my right ankle badly in 2009 (I’ll save this story for another day), which seemed to then set off a chain reaction of injuries. I tore my right meniscus, a part of the cartilage in your knee which helps to cushion and stabilize your joints, a few years after that and had to get surgery to repair it. Then, I re-tore it several months ago and had to get a second surgery to repair it yet again, putting me out of commission all of this past winter.

Note that the above 3 injuries were all on my right leg… well, my left leg must have been sick of putting up with my right leg’s sh*t, because just two months ago I come to find I now have an extensive tear on left meniscus. The only solution to the debilitating pain I was experiencing yet again was of course, surgery, except this time around things have been much more difficult because I now have both of my legs out of commission rather than one “good leg” to help me out.

If you’re wondering how these tears happened, I don’t have much more of a clue than you do. The very first tear happened when I was doing a lunge, and yes, I did feel it pretty much immediately. (So keep that in mind the next time you’re working out…) The second two tears are, and always will be, a complete mystery to me. Contrary to what someone may guess about me, considering I tend to wear Lululemon + Nike sneakers on a daily basis because #athleisure, I am not a very active person and don’t do any of the things that are said to CAUSE meniscal tears, like running, playing sports, lifting weights, etc.

The past year has been incredibly draining, both physically and emotionally. When you struggle to even walk around your house, let alone be able to go out into the world and lead a normal life, it is beyond frustrating and upsetting. And just when I thought I was finally making some headway and was getting my right knee rehabilitated, to have my left knee pull me down all over again was a major blow. Of course, I’m fully aware that there are way worse things going on in the world and have tried my best to maintain a positive, grateful attitude (though it’s been tough at times!).

Imagine no longer being able to drive, stand on the subway, sit in a seat for the duration of a movie, or take a flight of stairs– all things that many of you probably do on a daily/monthly basis without much thought. I now have months of physical therapy ahead of me for both of my legs, and I can’t wait to be able to do those things again; to essentially get my independence back. Not to mention, I am not allowed to wear heels (which for a fashion blogger is tragic) and haven’t been allowed to work out or do any physical activity for the past YEAR. As I mentioned, I’m not a super active person, but I used to love doing yoga and would rely on the occasional cardio sesh to help negate my bad eating habits (give me ALL the sweets and carbs). Being inactive for an entire year has definitely taken a toll on my physique, and when you can no longer fit into many of your jeans, it takes a toll on your self-esteem, as well.

So, how does all of this affect my blog? The short answer is no #OOTD posts for a little while, womp womp. I’m not at the point where I am able to stand and pose for photos, plus my left knee is currently quite swollen– I’m not eager to show it off by wearing skirts, shorts or dresses, and it itself doesn’t fit into any of the pants that do fit me right now (which again, aren’t many ??‍♀️– R.I.P. summer bod 2017).

*However, I am still committed to keeping my blog updated with plenty of other kinds of posts so keep checking back every week! Plus, I have been doing lots of online shopping and have a ton of new outfits I can’t wait to show you as soon as I’m able to. ?

 

 

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